WARNING: FURIOUS IF NOT INVITED TO ANY AND ALL WEDDINGS

CAUTION: IF EVENTUALLY MADE COMFORTABLE ENOUGH WITH YOU WILL SPEND 90% OF TIME EXCITEDLY TELLING YOU ABOUT TWEETS SHE SAW AND ENJOYED

YOUNG PERSON BLAMING ALL FLAWS ON BEING “AN ARTIST” ON BOARD!

MY ADOLESCENT NOSTALGIA-OBSESSED REGRESSIVE PERSONALITY IS AN HONORS STUDENT!

HAZARD: ABUNDANT REFERENCES TO THE MOVIE “SPLASH” AHEAD

CAUTION: WILL TOTALLY JUDGE THE SHIT OUT OF YOU IF REVEALED THAT YOU ARE RICH

WARNING: POST-DOCUMENTARY RANTER ENCLOSED

CONSTRUCTION: TO BE COMPLETED ONLY WHEN “CHEERS”-ERA DANSON DELIVERS REASSURING HUG